I wish I was joking.

Haven’t seen the introvert in a while, so I figured I’d see him for dinner, and catch up (or at the very least get a free meal).. I know it’s wrong, but I’m poor and I don’t feel like buying a new vacuum cleaner yet (and I’m borrowing his at the moment).

It was post-exam evening, and my brain was fried.. usually I’m the talker in our dates.  However, today I was exhausted. So while I was quiet.. he finally took the initiative to start talking.

And I wish he never did..

He started with “So I’m really into reptiles.” Ok fine.

Then he proceeds to list and describe all of the reptiles he once had as a child.  Notables include a 3 foot alligator (that his sister brought home), multiple snakes, and a turtle that he lost in the storm.  

But what was worse than all of that.. was the fact that he once shot a squirrel on one of your “run of the mill” hunting expeditions.  ”It was coming right at him” which he thought was hilarious.. then they proceeded to clean and make squirrel soup.

Me during this dinner?  Blank stares and chugging my beers. Yes, plural. 

He’s cooking me dinner tonight, I’m returning his vacuum cleaner, never seeing him again.. and never looking back.

  1. pairandaspare posted this